Laura Hunter Therapies

Why Can’t I Tell My Therapist Everything?

Therapy is a journey of self-discovery and healing, a process through which we uncover layers of our experiences, thoughts, and emotions. It’s a space where we’re encouraged to share openly and honestly to facilitate our growth and understanding. Yet, many find themselves asking, “Why can’t I tell my therapist everything?” This hesitance can stem from various reasons, shaping the way we engage in therapy. In this blog post, we’ll explore what you can and cannot share with your therapist, delve into reasons why sharing everything might feel challenging, and offer strategies to overcome these hurdles.


Entering therapy opens up a realm of potential for personal development and emotional healing. It’s a space where words carry the power to unlock understanding and change. However, the thought of revealing every nook and cranny of our minds can be daunting. The dynamic of sharing with a therapist is complex, influenced by societal norms, personal boundaries, and the therapeutic relationship itself. Let’s navigate these waters together, understanding the nuances of communication in therapy.

Things You Can and Cannot Share With Your Therapist

  1. Can Share: Virtually anything that pertains to your thoughts, feelings, experiences, and concerns can be shared with your therapist. This includes your fears, hopes, dreams, and the intricate details of your daily life.
  2. Cannot Share: While open communication is encouraged, there are legal and ethical boundaries. For instance, therapists are bound by law to report if you pose a direct threat to yourself or others, or if there’s evidence of child or elder abuse.

Why You Might Feel Unable to Share

  1. Fear of Judgement: One common barrier is the fear of being judged. Despite knowing that therapy is a judgement-free zone, societal stigmas around vulnerability can make it hard to open up fully.
  2. Shame and Vulnerability: Discussing deeply personal or painful experiences can evoke feelings of shame. Vulnerability is powerful but can also be intensely frightening, leading some to withhold certain details.
  3. Trust and Safety: Building trust takes time. You might not feel entirely safe sharing everything with your therapist initially, especially if you’re in the early stages of your therapeutic relationship.

Overcoming the Difficulty of Sharing

  1. Gradual Disclosure: Remember that therapy is a process. You don’t need to share everything all at once. Start with what feels manageable and gradually disclose more as your comfort level increases.
  2. Discuss Your Fears: Talking about your hesitancy to share can be a therapeutic act in itself. Your therapist can help you explore these feelings and work toward overcoming them.
  3. Write It Down: If verbalising is difficult, consider writing down your thoughts and feelings to share with your therapist. This can be a less intimidating way to convey what’s on your mind.


The path of therapy is unique to each individual, filled with moments of courage, discovery, and sometimes, hesitation. If you find yourself pondering, “Why can’t I tell my therapist everything?” know that you’re not alone. It’s a part of the process, a stepping stone towards deeper understanding and healing. Remember, your therapist is there to guide and support you, every step of the way, at a pace that feels right for you.

If you’re curious about starting therapy or looking to deepen your therapeutic journey, I invite you to book a discovery call with me. Together, we can explore your therapeutic goals, address any hesitations, and pave a path towards a more open and fulfilling therapy experience. Remember, it’s not about sharing everything at once, but sharing in a way that supports your growth and well-being. Let’s embark on this journey together.

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